The Fall of Tony Stark
by mewlingquimlover
Summary: No one wants to see the superhero fall, be stripped down to their humanity. But Darcy Lewis does and she's alright in Tony's mind.
1. Chapter 1

I watch him move his fingers in thin air, little specs of light following them as he builds a three-dimensional diagram out of nothing. He always provides substance in empty spaces, rather with his hands or his mind. It's always on, always creating, always projecting little pieces of him into air around him.

His fingers are so precise and I get lost in watching them. They move with finesse as they articulate each detail of whatever idea is being born inside his head. It's like he is painting, but with flair and style yet there is no music playing for him to follow a rhythm of.

But I can see it, they way his fingers dance out a beat, the way his mouth parts and how his eyes always snap shut in just the right second when he brings his bottom lip between those white teeth. It's as if he is on cue to some sensual dance move and the idea in front of him is a woman he just pulled up against him.

"Tony … it's getting late." I finally break the silence between us. He looks up at me, his hand slamming down on the metal table in front of him. That idea dissolving into tiny pieces of light fragments turning into nothingness.

"I don't need to sleep. I need to fix this so just do your job and get me some coffee and food." He snaps at me, his eyes look like shallow graves against his paling skin.

I look around and see two empty glass bottles on the floor, one next to his hand. All from the higher end of his whisky line up. I've only been gone three days, just three days. I got assigned as Tony's liaison three months ago since I'm not science smart like Jane but know way too much for Shield to let me lose out in the world unguarded, unwatched. .

Plus regardless of what people may think of my foul inappropriate mouth or genuine natural born hacking abilities, I did go to Culver. I did graduate and yes it was in Political Science. But all that did was make me a better negotiator and a professional unbiased person on heated opinions.

In other words I dissect political issues, present both options and weigh in what I feel favors as the better solution.

And that is what you need when being Tony Stark's liaison, especially when Shield is involved. Because everything is a political issue, personal or not.

"I'm not your fucking secretory or caretaker. So go get it yourself unless you're too scared to leave the safety of this room." I snap back at him with a harsh voice.

"If you're not going to help then just get the hell out of my lab, infact, just take your ass back home or wherever the hell you went." His words aim to hurt me but they are not slurred. He doesn't seem as drunk as he should be with all these empty bottles. Or maybe he has been down here for several days?

"No!" I fire back.

His hand snatches the empty liquor bottle next to him, expensive whisky staining the air around us. He turns from me and the bottle hits the wall at the end of the lab, raining glass down on the floor. His own robotic AI moves with a whimpering sound to go clean it up.

Dummy.

Tony turns back to face me, "Leave me alone! Don't you get it, I'm running out of time. I'm the only one smart enough to figure this out, it's me that has to clean up Killians mess!"

"But you don't have too, Tony. Let me bring in Bruce." I say softly at him.

"I don't have too? Ha! Do you have any idea what I'm dealing with? What this fucking mad man did, created and now it's spreading and people are dying! Because of me." His fist hits the metal table and I can see the red marks already mapping his knuckles.

I move over to him, I'm not afraid Tony.

I've seen him at a lower point than this, it was the day after Pepper's funeral. That was four months ago.

I palm his face and hold his eyes with mine, he wants to fall apart and be human. He wants to grieve but when you're a superhero you don't have that luxury. And he is Iron Man, the mask is always on even when he is out of the suit.

Because let's face it, no one wants to see a superhero stripped down to their humanity, no one but me.

"It's not your fault. It's not your fault.." I keep chanting to him, leaning my head forward and pressing our foreheads together.

"She's gone.. he took her from me. And I WILL BE DAMN IF HE TAKES ANOTHER!" He screams at me, pulling his face away from me. His words bath my face, his anger kiss every inch of my skin in firing range from his lips.

But he lets me hold his face, he doesn't push away.

"She loved you Tony. Now let me take care of you." I tell him.

"She was all I had, all that was good in me. And now … I'm going to push you away and then I will have nothing."

"Ha!" I let out a soft laugh and roll my eyes at him, "For a genius you're rather stupid to think if you can push me away. I will always do what I want."

"Promise me Darcy." His tone is serious and my fingers press a little sterner into his cheeks, to let him know I'm grounded to him and this is real. "You're my only friend left." And just like that, the mask is finally off.

"Yes.. Tony, I promise." I push up on my toes and let my lips graze his for a second, it's soft and only last for a second. I just want him to feel something, make him remember this moment. Engrave those words into his memory. "And now it's sealed." I pull away from him and wink with a smile at him.

"Now let's eat and then you shower and sleep while I call Bruce. And maybe Jane, she does weird science shit too." I hold my hand out to him and he takes it.

* * *

><p>It's been three months since I kissed Tony. It was brash and quick and meant nothing at the moment. I just wanted to be there for him and let him know with me, there is no pretending, no judging just honesty and friendship.<p>

More than that, I wanted him to have faith in himself again. In his ability to be the hero again. That it was okay to fall as long as you get back up.

And yes, some falls hurt more than others and his fall was Pepper's. Her death at the hands of Killian. But what hurt more was when she came back as a human torch nearing the end of the battle and took Killian down with her. Holding him, keeping him stuck to her as Tony had to pull the trigger so to speak.

She died a hero, she took Tony's death away from him and part of him hates her for that but not more than he hates himself for not catching her in the first place.

But that was then and this is now.

Him and Bruce managed to find a cure for Killians rejected candidates and no one has blown up into itty bitty pieces in over two month. I never heard back from Jane, I guess wireless signal in Asgard doesn't exist.

He also talks to Bruce and not just when science is involved. Bruce hates it but he doesn't stop him either. Not even when Tony manages to corner him in some room. He just sits there and lets him talk. I even caught Tony just two weeks ago sitting on a bar stool in the common gym area while Bruce was meditating. He was just talking, nonsense, just in circles. He even then paced around Bruce while eating potato chips, he is so loud when he eats!

I slipped out before either of them noticed me.

* * *

><p>"Fucking unbelievable…" I huff out into the dimly lit common area room, throwing my bag down on the loveseat and making way to the kitchen to find something to eat - disregarding the fact I was just on a date.<p>

I find Tony in there, a pizza slice in his hand and a few boxes behind him on top of the stove.

"Hey kid." I lock my eyes on him and glare hard, I hate that nickname. He lifts his hands in defense, pizza slice still in his grip. "Don't shoot, I ordered pizza." He replies back with a weird smile.

"You only eat pizza when things are bad. Are you dying? Am I dying? Did you expose me to some bat shit crazy science thing when I found you and Bruce in his lab a week ago with evidence of something going very wrong?"

"No.. I'm not dying and you're not dying. But thank you for asking."

"Good, I'm in my prime. You've had your fun and cake too." I snip back and he looks shocked at my words, his hand hovering over his metal light bulb infused heart.

"You wound me." And I want to laugh at his antics, instead I bite my lip to keep it from slipping out because I'm not sure what I'm doing right now.

It's late, I'm coming back from a shit date that I abruptly ended twenty minutes into it and he is just being Tony and I'm here in my favorite black heels and red dress with slightly smeared red lipstick from a horrible kiss.

And let's not forgo the fact I can't shake that 'meant nothing' non sexual kiss I gave him almost four months ago. But I can describe in details how his lips felt and tasted with liquor still wetting them like lipgloss. So now I keep myself away from him when no one else is around and during moments like this.

"Then stop calling me kid." I say harshly to looks confused by my words and whatever smile that was there is now gone. Way to fuck up Darcy!

"I ordered too much out of habit, Pepper always hated the type I got." His voice goes dry and I feel like a horrible person. "She prefered regular plain old pepperoni and I like everything on it. So there is some in there since I know you didn't eat on your date." And now I feel like an even bigger asshole.

"Pepper had excellent taste." I tell him with a soft voice, in my own fucked up way of apologizing.

"She did." He perks up slightly.

"So how did you know I didn't eat on my date? Did you spy on me?" I ask him, moving up to him and pushing him out the way from the pizza boxes. Changing the subject quickly.

"You will never catch a guy if you keep man handling them like that." He sasses me at shoving him and this time I do laugh but it's nulled with the pizza slice in my mouth.

"Asshat." I muffle to him between pieces of chewed of pizza in my mouth.

"Or with bad manners like that. Didn't you have parents who taught you to not talk and chew at same time?"

"Haha!" I roll my eyes at him and go back to the box for another slice to take with me on my way to my room.

"You can eat in here, with me. I don't bite."

"Oh how deprived you must be to want the company of a kid." It's now my turn to be dramatic.

"Well don't come home with smeared lipstick."

"It's barely smudged, but you should see his lips." I wink at him.

"Did you punch him or taze him? I can't afford to bail you out of trouble."

"Yes you can. And it was just a well placed slap, backhand of course because I'm not a lady as you pointed out a second ago. My ring caught his lips. Hopefully he will think twice before trying to shove his tongue down someones throat."

He smirks at me and moves over to me, half way caging me between himself and the stove as he fumbles with the box to get another slice for himself.

"So, did you spy. Yes or no?" I ask him with a cheerful tone.

"Simple deduction, home early and this isn't your bedroom" His voice changes and for the first time I notice his honey colored eyes. They aren't brown, light brown, but gold like warm honey. How beautiful they are when not adrenaline blown or blood shot from too much alcohol.

"And next time pick a better guy to take you out." His breath is warm and I can't bring my eyes away from his. I can so easily slip away from him, he is only blocking half my side but I don't.

Both his legs inch closer around my left leg. I should leave, but I don't want to move.

He leans in softly, his lips graze mine, pushing just softly. They are wet and I smell rich scotch on them. He nudges mine apart with his top lip and just places a kiss against my bottom lip. It's wet and soft and then over. His hands never touched me, just his lips.

He backs up from me barely, "I wouldn't do that if you weren't a lady." His voice burns me like cheap rum racing in my mouth and down to my stomach. And then he turns to leave with pizza slice in his hand. I have no idea how even managed to get it out of the box while doing that. Fucking magic hands.

"Wait.. what just happened?" I say out loud.

"I believe Sir is being human, Miss Lewis." JARVIS speaks into the air, his tight voice with a flair of British accent to sound more rich.

"Huh."

"Indeed." JARVIS replies back. And I can't help but smile at his remark.

I go to my purse and fetch my phone, scrolling through I click on the one name who I can share this with but fully understand it's probably a 50/50 chance I will even get a response.

Jane: "Tony kissed me. I think it was … awesome?!"


	2. Chapter 2

"Tony, Fury is on his way since you have officially blown him off the last three times." I voice out, marching into his private lab with all intents of grabbing him by his shirt and dragging him to Starks main warehouse where all the really large expensive toys go after being built.

Soon as I walk in I feel apart of myself twisting into something I can't really name embarrassment is good place to start Lewis!. All I know is there is a long legged blonde with her ass planted firmly on his drafting metal table, the blue and white marked papers crumbling under her skin and bunched up skirt. A red thong hanging from her foot that is pressed against Tony's back.

His face buried between her legs and his fingers pushing into her sun kissed thighs, spreading her legs wider while she throws her head back and keeps her eyes shut tight.

I don't bother interrupting them.

I know I should but not for the wrong reasons, not for Tony living back up to his reputation or at the female for just letting herself be another notch on his bedpost or in this case lab notch?

But I should clear my throat, ask her to leave and tell Tony to wipe his face, put on one of his tailored suits and come with me to meet Fury. But the funny thing is, this is the first time I have seen him be him. And for whatever reason, that means more to me at the moment in some fucked up way.

I walk out without being caught, holding my breathe while I hear a moan followed by a "Fuck .. yes." and the sound of his pants being undone.

All of a sudden, that kiss he gave me a week ago doesn't seem so important now inside my head.

* * *

><p>Getting off the elevator I see Tony lounging in the official 'unofficial' common area of the Avengers tower. Also known as the room Loki threw him out the window. For whatever reason, when all the Avenger boys are in town, they hang out here. So much that Stark had to relocate his living space to the level below it.<p>

"Where have you been snow white?" He greets me with a cheeky grin sitting indian style on his half circle leather sofa. An open packet of goldfish dropped onto the coffee table. An old movie playing on the tv in black and white.

His casual clothes back in place. A dark worn pair of jeans barely loose over his legs and a faded AC/DC t-shirt that no longer looks black but more like dark charcoal. His blue heart glowing through the worn out threading of the shirt.

"Doing your job." I roll my eyes at him.

"Isn't that your job, to play nice between my company and Shield for me?" He looks at me.

"Yes, yes it is. But it's also your job to be there when I do, especially in your own backyard so to speak. I went to meet Fury at the warehouse to show him the new prototype for your orbiting giant never ending battery thingy to slingshot out into space."

"First, I call it the blue light special. Second, was someone mean to you on the playground today Lewis?"

"Forget it." I sigh at him, marching over to the coffee table and snatching the bag of goldfish from him.

"Hey, you could at least leave me another handful."

I ignore him and just keep walking back towards the elevator to go down five levels to my living quarters. That was the deal I made, I wanted a penthouse sweet, so no other "apartments" on my floor. Just one fucking huge floor all to myself. Basically I pulled a Tony.

"Did someone pull your pigtails Lewis? Or push you off the monkey bars?"

I stop dead in my tracks, I have never wanted to punch him so bad until now. I turn around to face him, he looks proud of himself and reminds me of the man I use to see in interviews on a shity laptop screen while working for Jane in our makeshift lab made up of mostly duct tape and wires and other sorts.

"I would tell you to go fuck yourself, but seeing as some tanned blonde already took care of that today, I won't. Actually you know what, yeah, go fuck yourself Tony."

"Enjoy the show?" He fires back, his face stern as he looks me dead in the face.

"Didn't stick around, I'm not here to stroke your ego."

"So why didn't you say anything and drag me out of there, Pepper would have."

"I'm not Pepper, I don't take out your trash for your convenience."

"What the hell is that suppose to mean!" He actually barks at me, getting off the sofa and striding over to me.

I cock my head up at him when he invades my space.

"First off, you hired me for my mouth to work in your favor for negotiations , not for my class or tact in dealing with your personal life. Second, I'm not in love with you. I don't give a shit who you fuck. Plus you're just being you, the original Tony. And honestly it's about fucking time, I was beginning to seriously doubt the playboy part of your description."

"So that's what you think of me? That I'm just some drunk working my cock through the next line of females in front of me?" He actually yells at me, his voice is rough and I know I struck a nerve deep inside him. I shouldn't said though, what I said about Pepper.

Everything else is fair game.

"Look, that was rude on the Pepper part, she was something I can never be for you. But at least you're finally living again and not just working in circles with a bottle in each hand. So yes, I walked in with intent on dragging you out to see Fury, but I saw you between her legs, and then just left because I thought it was best that way."

"Get out Lewis."

It's the first time I actually feel dejected by those words coming out of his mouth, asking me to leave. It's not the first time he has said them to me, but it's the first time I don't fight it.

It makes my heart squeeze for a second. Like I just kicked my best friend in the face for no fucking good reason.

I give him my back and just let the little package of goldfish fall to the floor and head to the elevator and I feel like I can't walk fast enough to escape the whole he is burning into the flesh of my back. And when his foot steps down over the goldfish, the crunch of it echos like a gunshot to my head.

Or maybe to my heart?

* * *

><p>"Jarvis, where is Tony?" I ask feeling some what relieved to not find him again in his private in the middle of his sexual encounter.<p>

"In his office at Stark's tower, in a private meeting with Fury."

"Huh. Why wasn't I notified?"

"Sorry to say, but it's off the books and privy to Sir and Fury only Miss Lewis."

"Wonderful." I sigh in a moment of frustrations. No telling what deal is being stuck with the devil at the moment.

"Should I inform Sir you are looking for him?"

"No, not this time Jars." I tell him feeling a little uneasy but what the hell, I need a break from Tony today after last night. Well, more like, hide from him for a few days.

"Anything else Darcy?" JARVIS ask and I giggle a little inside my head.

"Aww.. you called me Darcy and not Miss Lewis for the first time." I smile for no one to see.

* * *

><p>It's almost one in the morning and still no sign of Tony. I'm alone his fancy tower, the workers below in the first five levels long gone home and no other superhero's are gracing this tower tonight. Bruce went to Singapore with the Nat and Clint to help out on some crazy abstraction thing that I'm not suppose to know about.<p>

The tv on mute, more for background light from shitty infomercials and my laptop warming my legs while I sit on the expensive sofa inside the common living area.

But the world is still spinning on somewhat peaceful.

S.H.I.E.L.D. hasn't come in uninvited and there is no leaked photo's or videos on the internet of bad behavior of Tony. So guess everything is fine?

So why does it bother that I have no idea where he is? I know I want to hide from him at the moment, but I also don't want to undo all the progress he has made in the last five months either. And to be honest, I miss my friend.

"Jarvis, is Tony safe?"

"Sir is fine Darcy."

"Do you know where he is?"

"I am restricted from telling your Miss Lewis."

"Back to Miss Lewis, I see. Can you just send me a photo of him at the moment so I know he is alive and you're not being hacked by someone else to say these things."

"I assure you, I am not hacked."

"I bet I could hack you Jars." I tell him, using my favorite nickname for him and it almost sounds like a stuffy englishmen snorting back at me. It makes me somewhat smile.

"I just do not believe right now would be the best of time to send you a live photo that he is indeed breathing and not under duress."

"Oh please, I've seen him doing all sorts of weird shit. Just this once Jarvis… please and I will leave you alone."

"Your laptop, Miss Lewis."

And there it was, Tony, with a redhead straddling him with her dress wearing only around her midsection. She is pale and looks tall and thin. I can see something written in French on the wall behind them. A hotel room no doubt, in France if I know Tony.

Plus the obvious French being spoken in slow whines of heated lust only confirms it.

"Thank you." I say softly, closing the laptop without even bothering to turn it off properly.

"Shall I order you some pad thai Miss Lewis, you have not eaten dinner yet?"

"It's one in the morning, I hate to burst your super brain, but nothing is open that serves that. I'm done for the night, thank you for your assistance Jarvis."

Making my way to my own private floor, I drag myself into a hot shower and when I get out I find pad thai sitting on a beautiful plate on top of my dining table. A note next to it.

"Anything is possible for you, Darcy. - J"

"Thank you." I whisper softly not knowing if he hears me or not. Pad thai is my favorite food but also my comfort food as well. Jarvis knows this.

Grabbing my food with one hand I snatch up my phone and head to my bed. I take a few bites and send out a quick text.

"Jane! Stop banging goldilocks and talk to me. I know you're on Earth, Fury let it slip a few days ago."

"God.. Stark is not a good role model for you. And Thor isn't here, Asgard and Odin stuff. His dad called me a goat. Again."

"Then why are you texting me and not calling me?"

Finally my phone rings and I chuckle a little picking it up, "Put down the science tool and close the computer screen. I need your full attention."

"Is the world dying? Did he blow up something really bad, because I'm not that kind of scientist that fixes things. Unless it's space and time related." I can hear the slight hopefulness in her voice that he did.

She will always be science first.

"The world is spinning and nothing is broken. I'm just reverting back to me when I first meet you. I need your cold and calculating emotions to tell me what I absolutely do not want to hear but needs to be said."

"Darcy, I don't have time for this. Thor is due back in three days and I have to finish this before he gets back because I need to make it work so I ca-."

"Jane!" I scream her name and I can hear her pause, "I think I like Tony and he kissed me. And it wasn't dirty or wet, it was just simple but it did things to me. But I just for the second time in a row caught him with two different women. And he is ignoring me."

"Oh."

"Yeah and this last one looked like Pepper."

"Darcy I'm not good at this, I always picked assholes and then I picked a nonasshole who is always leaving me."

"What is wrong with us? And why didn't you return my calls when Tony needed help a two months ago with the Killian thing?! People were dying in an exploding fashion. Do you even read your text? At least Bruce came through."

"I was in Asgard with Thor … I didn't know. I'm sorry Darcy but I have to go. I have to get this done."

"You're useless. It's always science with you and you wonder why Thor keeps leaving you with no words between his visits."

"I know." She barely whispers to me and I already feel bad. I know she is emotionally nulled but in her weird way does care to some extent. I don't think she was hugged enough as a kid.

"I'm sorry Jane. That was mean."

"But I'm trying.. I have a non-science day now once a week with Thor. I'm trying to get this bridge thing open and working so I don't have to use the bifrost, Odin kind of banned me from it and he may Thor as well. And Thor is trying to fix things between them but he can't because he still refuses to take the throne. And I'm getting older and he.. "

"You love him?" I ask her, she has never said it and I've always wondered if she did because I mean it all happened so fast between them and then he was gone for like two years.

"Yes. But I want more time and that is only going to come from Odin and the Yargelis tree itself." She tells me and it rather hurts to hear her sound like she does now.

"You will figure it out. So are you wearing lady clothes still or back too pajamas?" I change the subject for her sake.

"Do you like Tony?" She asks me now.

"Avoiding question, pajamas it is. And I think I'm beyond like but he is still clearly in love with Pepper."

"Huh." Is all she says.

"Come out here, let Stark help you. Let him throw money at you so at least one of us can get our happy ever after."

"I have to go Darcy."

Fine. I'm sending a driver to pick you up tomorrow and will have a private plane for you. Pack or don't pack. Just bring your notes and let me show you how all accomplished and grown up I am now."

"Ok." She sighs back and the phone goes dead.


	3. Chapter 3

It's been four days since I last saw Tony and three nights of wanting to erase that image from my head with him and that red head.

Jane is here now and so is Thor. Apparently the talk with daddy Odin did not go well because New York was almost drowned in a flood last night. But he is here and Jane is keeping her promise of a non science day to spend it with him.

I set her up in a lab below the one Banner uses now that he is a permanent resident though currently out doing something I'm not suppose to know about because I'm not classified.

"Puh..fucking.. please. Shield clearance my ass." I mumble to myself because the first thing I did when he left was relieve my youthful hacking days and I know for a fact he and the Black Widow are not playing nice in some snowy patch of land with Hawkeye meeting them there.

I wonder though if Tony would be doing what he is doing if Bruce has stayed. But he should have known he could have talked to me. Though it did take him a week to pull these stunts after Bruce left, so I guess he did have some restraints.

However I did let Jane go nuts ordering new toys yesterday courtesy of Stark. However all her stuff is off the books and kept private from Shield. They know she is here now and that Thor is back again.

Everything else is Darcy Lewis classified!

Jane actually hugged me for a second and said she was sorry and I laughed at her and said she was by far my favorite socially handicapped weird scientist though Bruce is a close runner up with his beautiful eyes and shaggy hair. Plus he is more emotionally damaged then socially damaged.

I have taken Thor out a few times and it was fun reconnecting with him again. We bonded in London for sure and I feel like we just picked up where we left off. Like no time has passed and it hasn't been a year since I last saw him.

Making my way up in the elevator, settling for a shitty movie and a bottle of wine for the night to tuck me in. Before the doors can open I hear the faint sound of a feminine giggle and I know that giggle doesn't belong to Nat or Jane, the only other females allowed up here.

And S.H.I.E.L.D. ladies don't laugh, they shot guns and throw knives.

But this is the unofficial Avengers official flop and drop floor as a group.

Soon as the elevator doors open fully my heart stops for a second, another red head, this time pale and short with a slightly curvy bottom is sitting in Tony's lap, his mouth latched to one of her small pert breast. The opening of his button up shirt disheveled across her chest.

Those hands I once thought were made of magic never looked so plain and ordinary holding her sides and keeping her in his lap.

This time I will not walk away. This is my home, part of my world, not his private lab.

I let my bare feet slap on the floor with each step, catching their attention finally. She looks shocked and embarrassed, desperately pulling from his lap and covering herself with his shirt.

What little bit of flushed pink she had on her face is no longer there and her eyes are wide with fear as she looks from me and him.

"Jarvis, see her out." I announce out loud, stern and as if this was my entire building and I wasn't in my Captain America's pajama pants and Iron Man tank top.

"Of course Miss Lewis. I already have a car awaiting to take her anywhere she needs to go and a change of clothes on the first floor in the ladies dressing room for her as well."

Tony doesn't bat an eyelash, "Sorry, looks like work is calling." He says flately to the girl who looks a little lost about it all and somewhat hurt. Did she really think she was going to be the next Pepper Pots? That he would magically fall for her and give her a fairytale romance story.

But there is nothing magical about Tony Stark, at least not anymore.

She walks past me to the elevator, her head down either out of embarrassment or to hide tears.

"Next time, keep your plaything in your own private floor or hell down in the fucking lab. Not in here. This is my home too."

"Seeing as the name on the buildings deed is mine, I think that gives me a pass to do whatever I want." He moves to stand and I note the Black Sabbath shirt he is wearing and that fuels a fire inside me. That's my shirt he stole from me, it got mixed in with his laundry one day and he refused to give it back.

It was my favorite men's shirt to sleep in, the next day my bed had an Iron Man shirt on it in a retro design with a sticky note that said "You're not old enough to appreciate Black Sabbath and their greatness. But you are cool enough for Iron Man."

"So this is your plan now, to deal with things. Fuck every red head that comes along the way, try and get another Pepper." I walk up to him, facing off with him again, in the same room, over the same subject at hand.

"Then what are you? Aren't you her replacement? My new handler as Fury calls you." His barb is hurtful and mean, my hand slides across his face like fluid.

Those hands that now look dirty to me are gripping my forearms like metal death hands.

"Tony, she is dead! You have got to let it hit you, ruin you and then get up and walk again.. not this shit…" And I want to cry to and break but I can't, because he is the one that needs to fall apart. Not me.

"I went to Fury to give you your out. A normal life that doesn't involve me and my life."

"Why? Because I'm not bending over for you?" And it's a like a new fire is light in his eyes towards me and my smart mouth.

"I don't need another whore in my bed." His snaps at me, it's like venom rolling from his tongue. " But you … God … you don't fucking get it! You are Pepper, I am replacing her with you. You are the only other person besides her who has ever gave a shit about me outside my money."

His words are like a punch in the heart.

"So I went to Fury, to give you an out." And it's like he sucked all the air out of the room.

"So you think that you're being kind to me? Pushing me away, going behind my back to do it! And then what, thinking fucking all these women will somehow make you human again and forget about your life with Pepper?!"

"I haven't fucked anyone! And I want to forget, I don't want to remember what it feels like to be in love anymore! I WANT TO BE NUMB BUT YOU WILL NOT LET ME!" He screams at me, his closes in the space between us. The press of his jeans between my legs give note to the non-existing bulge. She didn't excite you?

"Let me go ." I hiss at him and he does. He doesn't want me .. he wants me to be his new Pepper.

"And I'm not your stand in Pepper."

"You're right, you're not her and I don't need you anymore. Get out of my life Miss Lewis."

* * *

><p>I'm at Jane and Thor's apartment, knocking and knocking until someone opens the door.<p>

"Jane.." I whisper her name softly as she opens the door. This time I fling myself into her body and she stands here for a second before she hugs me back. It's awkward but then her hands drifts and press a little harder into me and it feels real. A real hug.

I pull away from her and just look at her, "He fired me and went behind my back to Fury to allow me to leave and live a normal life and not be trapped by Shied and shipped off to some nomans land because I'm too invested with so much knowledge."

"I found two gray hairs."

"The fucking nerve of him! And he was with another female … in my fucking home!"

"Thor said he will age himself by magic with me."

"He said he is trying to make me into Pepper because he is still in love with her."

And just like that we stare at each other with all our hurt laid out in the open between us.

"You're not going to leave though?" She asks me and it's slightly warming because I can see in these rare moments she does care. Like I said though, not hugged enough as a child.

"I think it's time but don't worry, you are under lock and key with a fat contract. Plus Thor is here and this is the 'Avengers' tower, so you are not going anywhere."

And now it's her turn to surprise hug me and correctly within the first second of it. "We should do lunch, once a week at least. I'm a shitty friend, but I do miss you. I miss New Mexico."

"No, you miss the fact I am the only one who can understand you and translate your babble."

"That too but it's more than that. You … you were my friend." She fumbles over her words, still holding on to me.

"Look at you! Spreading your emotional wings, I'm so proud of you. And I still am your friend, so start using your damn phone." I tell her, pulling away from her arms.

"I never changed my ringtone."

"Really?" I raise an eyebrow at her.

"I know how, now." She pauses and I can see her thinking before she speaks, "But then I would forget about you and our time before all the crazy because I always let science take over. And I didn't want to forget."

"I've missed you Jane weirdly enough as well. Now I'm off to get drunk and pack." I tell her with a smirk and leave her apartment hoping Thor doesn't kill Tony if he heard our conversation but I hear no storm so I assume all is well.


	4. Chapter 4

Realization hit me once I stepped foot into my private floor. Everything that just happened is on reply inside my head.

All I can do is just feel, every insult and word laced with hate and anger that were aimed right at my guts and every organ I need to live.

But somewhere in between I think I felt love from him. It's misguided and messy though, he doesn't love me in the truest of sense. He loves the idea of me being here for him when no one else will be.

I guess he is right, I am his new Pepper but for all the wrong reasons.

I don't need a personal project to fix up as a partner and that's exactly what he would be. Plus he would fuck up, I would push him to far, and everything would blow up in our faces.

So this is best, for me to go.

But before I can pack or even look online for a new place I need to be drunk, I need to pull a Tony tonight because it's my turn to not feel anything.

"Hey Jars… can you email me a list of apartments available according to my taste. Well … within my budget which will not be much soon since I am now jobless and will be kissing the finer things goodbye in life."

"Miss Lewis, I am happy to assist you but perhaps if you let Sir sleep on it tonight I'm sure he will see what was said was out of anger."

"No, it's time."

"Well I am happy to inform you that Tony has stocked your bank account with enough funds to have a penthouse apartment for the rest of your life."

"Jars.. I'm going to miss one am pad thai."

"You don't have too Darcy."

"Good night Jarvis, I have to get drunk and then pack things I want to keep."

* * *

><p>It's been three hours and I have successfully consumed two bottles of wine and packed nothing! I did however manage to bring my two pillows and comforter into the kitchen because the cold floor felt good but also hard and uncomfortable. Drunk logic at it's best.<p>

And also maybe that same logic that is saying I will just leave everything behind and let him deal with it and just restock my life with new things while I rebuild my heart.

"God, I just sounded the very definition of Tony."

I hear the elevator moving, even in my drunkenness I can hear it. Tony swears I have bat hearing because it's suppose to be silent since he built the design for it.

"Jarvis, that better be my favorite dish of chicken pad thai or someone is getting tazed in the balls!" I yell the last part warning the idiot I know who is inside it, Tony.

Soon as the door opens I glare my eyes at the him standing there, he looks wet and his gray designer whatever they are sweatpants that don't look like the ones your parents wear but the ones you see in magazine are sitting way to fucking low on his hips.

A fitted muted brown shirt looks horrible with them. Parts of the shirt sticking to his chest and stomach - he either just showered or worked out. He should not look that good in that horrid outfit but he does, this is my Tony that I get to see correct, use too see and no one else does.

I notice even in my wine induced state though that he is clutching a piece of black material in his hand.

He walks over to me and I don't bother greeting him or getting up from the floor in front of the fridge. He drops the thing from his hand, it lands on my stretched out foot and I know exactly what it is. My Black Sabbath t-shirt.

He turns back around without a word and I feel like my insides are on fire by his lack of words or I'm getting ready to vomit. Who knows at this moment.

"Hey!" I scream at him, moving to stand and using the fridge to lean up against. He turns to face me and he is so ugly when he scowls.

"So that's it? You're kicking me out yet you bring me a shirt you have refused to give back to me since you got it. But you don't even have the balls to say something to me?"

Something snaps in the air between us, his walks back over to me, invades my space. My back hits the fridge fully now and he cages me in. His hands don't touch me, his body doesn't even graze mine.

But I can feel his breathe on my nose and see nothing but his eyes.

"I have nothing left to say to you."

"God! Make up your fucking mind Tony. First you think I'm your new Pepper, you think it's me you want just because you confuse my wanting to help you for her, for how she took care of you. And now you can't say shit, your just going to discard me as if I don't exist."

His lips actually curve into his famous smirk and I want to smack him again but that didn't do any good the last time.

"You fucking infuriate me and confuse me because you are the reason why I can't let go yet the reason I want too. You were right early, I don't need another Pepper. And I want to crack and fall apart but I'm the superhero and I'm not suppose too."

"Then why are you doing this to me?" I choke out to him with a few slipped tears.

"Because how am I suppose to tell my only true friend that I want to fuck her. That I want to keep her to myself like a selfish bastard and never share her with the world because the world ruins everything that is good in my life." His voice softens and his smile turns honest and soft.

"You don't .. you don't tell them because you can't cross that line and be friends again when things get messy."

"But what if I want messy, and the stage before that, and the aftermath as well."

"What about the girls..The lab and France."

"I called the blonde your name while she was on her knees in front of me. The redhead I closed my eyes and then imagined she was you and still I couldn't do it."

"Tony." I finally breathe out his name. And now it's me who is drunk, and it's his hands that are warm against my cheeks and it's his mouth that is sober this time. I'm not sure when the roles reversed but I do know that I'm about to make the biggest mistake of my life.

"Shut up Darcy." His words are rough and the press of his fingers on my face move just slightly as he tilts his head. His lips catch my bottom lip, giving me a soft kiss like before. But then it changes.

His hand get lost into my hair at the back of my head, pulling my face closer to his as he dominates my mouth. Those soft lips invading mine, his tongue dipping into my mouth. He taste like warm amber.

He deepens the kiss and I want to suffocate under the warmth he is giving from it, I want to have him bruise my mouth with those lips.

My body wraps around his, my legs hike up around his hips and feet lock together at his lower back. He presses me harder into the fridge to hold me up. My hands palm his shoulders. I kiss him just as hard, trying to match his fire.

His hands roam to my ass and the cool press of the fridge is no longer against my body as he walks us away from it.

I pull back from his lips and I peer into those eyes as he looks lost in lust mixed with love. And logic comes flying back into my head and I wiggle from his hold until my feet the floor and I stand in front of him.

"We can't. Not now … at least. I want all of you when you're ready." I tell him and it breaks me because I know without a doubt I am 100% in love with this broken man. But he still needs help and time and I will wait on him because I think he is worth rather he thinks he is or not.

His face crumbles and is smile is broken but when he reaches to cradle my face again I know it will be okay this time.

He leans back into me and kisses my forehead and walks back to the elevator, turns and looks back at me.

"Anything else, Ms Lewis?"

"Nope, that will be all Mr. Stark."

"For the record, there is no dating between then and now. Because when this happens and it will, I want you untouched and coiled around my hand. I promise you, I will light you up like the fourth of July." He tells me so sure of his words and his voice is already winding up the very heat inside me and making me want to say fuck it and have him now.

"I look forwarded to it, Mr. Stark." I tell him back and give him a wink before he leaves me to flop back down on the floor in a fit of giggles.

* * *

><p>"You are still here?" Jane looks at me as I step into the kitchen in search of some amazing coffee and to also just get out of my room even though I very well could make my own cup there.<p>

"Yep, I guess I am. We came to a happy agreement." I tell her with a smile on my face and it feels good because it feels like things are finally being put into place like they should.

"Ms Lewis, Dr Banner and company will be arriving shortly." Jarvis announces to me as I make myself a cup of coffee with all the delicious flavors I love to add.

"Does Tony?"

"Sir is aware." He announce back.

"Don't you find it weird that Tony's house can see and hear us at all times? It doesn't make you uncomfortable?"

"Nope, but London was with a half naked Erik." I snort back with a smile and Jane actually smiles at me, it's big and toothy. It's cute on her.

"What happened to your intern?" She asks me.

"Ian? He is in Russia now studying something. After Thor landed things changed and he knew when the getting was good so he took up a paid internship with some star gazing dude at the Pulkovo Observatory on some new radio frequency readings from the big above."

"That's amazing, I tried to intern there! Do you no longer talk with him? You were a couple right, I mean I saw you two at the loft … together." She looks at me and it's like she is calculating which words to use before she asks me because this is new territory for us.

"Sometimes, we are friends. Those kisses were more, thanks for saving my life type."

"So is that how one gets a kiss from you? You're aim is pretty high for something like that." I hear a slightly roughened voice come from behind me. I turn around on a sharp heel, my Captain America pajama pants still in place but with a Hulk fitted t-shirt because I may have cut up all my Iron Man shirts last night before Tony came in. Including my former favorite Iron Man sleeping shirt I had on before this one.

"Nevermind, totally worth it for you." He winks at me and fuck if he isn't half bad looking. He moves in front of me and I can see a few wrinkles at the corner his eyes that shows off his age and hard life. His dirty blonde hair cut short and messy.

But fuck me and call me a liar if he doesn't have, 'come get in my bed, I promise amazing things' blue eyes and ruddy lips and oh yeah.. almost Thor worthy arms.

But those aren't honey eyes and warm amber tasting lips. He isn't Tony.

"Not interested," I look him up and down, " but nice." I tell him with a wink.

He smirks at me, crosses his arms, "Clint Barton."

I mimic him, "Darcy Lewis, off limits. Tony's handler."

"I didn't think anyone can handle him, I know, I was his 'pretend one' once." A sultry voice enters the room and I look past Clint to see the infamous Black Widow.

"Didn't say it was easy but I have my tricks. By the way, love your thigh face crushing move. Saw it on live feed during the whole Alien invasion thing. And before you ask how, I hacked Shield to keep this one behind me from exploding on random agents showing up during said attack. Plus seeing Thors is like a lullaby for her."

"Natasha."

"Darcy. And this is Jane."

"Doctor Jane Foster. Astrophysicist, Thor's partner, and credited with being involved with both incidents in New Mexico and London. Darcy Lewis, genius hacker, previous intern of Foster and now Stark Industry liaison."

"Did you just say Thor's partner instead of girlfriend. Oh, I like you. You are just about as emotionally defective as her and Tony which means I must and will love you in some way."

"Did you just openly admit to loving me, Ms Lewis." Tony now walks into the room, looking as if he never sleep since he left my apartment but has on normal clothes now. Well, his lab style clothes. Faded band shirt and worn thin jeans.

"Whatever helps you sleep at night." I turn to grin at him and move back to the coffee machine and fix him a cup. I walk over to him, hand him a cup of black coffee with no trills.

"Banner is back, play nice. And talk." I tell him and he stiffens but breathes through it before just smiling at me as he looks down at me. I can see his free hand reaching up to touch me but he holds back.

"Will that be all Ms. Lewis? He asks, continuing this little name game between us.

"Yes that will be, Mr. Stark." I tell him with a quick nod and loving this new flow between us.

I walk away and leave them to socialize with each other which may have been bad, I think Clint is the only one who isn't socially handicapped but I know another smart ass when I see one.


	5. Chapter 5

The tower was soft and easy today, the people living here were busy being people. No treats, no criminals, no underhand manipulation from the good side either.

I saw Clint sneak out with Nat in normal clothes and she looked like a porcelain doll.

They don't announce they are a couple but she wears his arrow and he always lets her invade his space even up high when he is hiding with soft eyes because he doesn't see the Black Widow. He sees a woman named Natasha.

Thor and Jane are pretending she isn't aging and he doesn't have a title of a King he is ignoring. They are out and looked like loons when I caught him lifting her up to carry her away from her tools and she didn't protest but instead yelled she didn't want fancy or a bar but somewhere nice.

Even Bruce has left for some reason or another.

It's been almost a month and no one has killed anyone nor blown anything up. Clint is still a flirt but wicked fun in playing games that may involve other peoples sanity. Nat as I like to call her is very funny, in her own way. She sits with me when it's the end of the day and I'm unwinding or when I'm dancing in the kitchen while avoiding wanting to jump Tony because I have needs and he is hot as fuck - but he knows what he needs to do first.

But Tony isn't here right now, he has been gone all day and I know where too.

I go to grab my phone from my sofa and send him a quick text.

"I'm here, if you need me."

* * *

><p>He doesn't ask, he just invades me as I sit on the edge of my kitchen island. His hands pushing into the meat of my thighs to spread them open as he pushes himself into my space.<p>

His fingers curl into the edge of my sleeping shorts, I can feel his nails biting into my skin and his breath hot on my chest. His lips are trembling until he bits down onto the fabric of my shirt to stop it.

His eyes wets my shirt with his tears and I can do nothing but let him take from me whatever he needs. I run my fingers through his hair softly as his sobs come a little louder and his body shutters start to shake mine.

But I don't move, I give him what he needs.

He went to Pepper's grave. He is crying for the first time over her death.

Natasha warned me that when he broke he would come for me.

_"Clint broke once. After the Alien invasion, he looked at the footage of him under Loki's control. He counted every person he killed.I had to be whatever he wanted that night to help him. To give him that control back that was taken from him."_

_"Why are you telling me this Nat?"_

_"You've never even been with Tony and when he breaks he will need you to allow him to use you. It's possessive and dominating. Men like him and Clint don't break like an ordinary person. They need to feel and gain control while proving they are capable of still protecting. Of surviving."_

_"He will not hurt me."_

_"It's not about what you want, it's about what they need to feel whole again."_

_"Then I will give him that."_

_"Give a safeword to Jarvis once I leave this room."_

"Darcy.." His voice almost growls into my chest and even though this is fucked up it puts a heat inside me because I love this man and he is giving me what I asked of him and more.

But I can't give him complete control, not yet, not like this.

I'm not stupid and I'm not the Black Widow and Tony could hurt me and that would only damage him more in the end.

"Tony look at me." I whisper to him, manipulating the angle of his head to look up at me. Those beautiful big honey eyes and long lashes that are almost too feminine. The tears have stopped and he looks wrung out.

I can see his age and pain and I want wish it away.

"I love you and I don't need you to say it back. I just need you to know that I love you."

His hands are quick to change their place and my body is flush against his and off the kitchen island. His mouth is attacking mine and I try to pull back but he isn't having it so I give in and give him this bit of control.

But now my body is hitting my bed and his hands are pulling at my clothes and I move to sit up to stop him, I want this, but I want him here with me not just the need.

"Tony.." I choke on his name.

He stops and looks at me and holds my hands and crashes them against his chest, over his little blue heart and it's like a death grip.

"Darcy .. please don't tell me to go. You are all I have. She is gone.. and you.. I swear I'm not replacing.. I can just hold you but I need to feel you next to me and wake up with you next to me so please .. "

"Tony I will never leave you. I love you." And this time I move up against him and kiss him, his lips are more gentle this time but his fingers still burn my skin with heat and it has me moaning into his mouth.

"Now … now you can have me."

* * *

><p>"Lift your ass." His voice is demanding as he pushes my legs further apart, kneeling between them. His cock looking flushed and almost painfully purple at the tip. Part of my saliva till coating it before he rudely shoved me on my back and settled between my legs.<p>

He reaches behind me, finding one of the my pillows and shoving it under my ass. My complete lower half on display for him.

"Fucking beautiful."

I close my eyes out of embarrassment at him having such a view.

"So pink and wet … both of them." He actually coos at me like a mad man and a cheap thrill mixed with fear runs up my body and my brain goes on high alert at the fact he said "both" and I'm still untouched in one of those spots.

The feel of him invading me is like little sparks of electricity, every inch of him is being sucked in more and more by my own need and want. The press of his pelvis against my center is satisfying. He has teased me with a delicious tongue and the most magical fingers ever.

My hands reach up to his biceps, I snap my hips upwards and take on his girth. Fuck he fills me but not overwhelming, it's just perfect.

But when I see his eyes glaze over I know the ball is back in his court and I latch onto his arms tighter as he pulls out and slams into into me.

"Fuck!" I moan up to him with closed eyes.

He does it again. It's amazing and adds friction to all the right places.

I'm not going to last long, too much teasing but he does with teasing and sets his pace to simple fuck me through the mattress.

"That's it .. come undone." He barely manages to get the words out, sweat rolls down his skin and he moves forwarded , caging me down into the bed with just a pillow to tilt my hips.

My limbs latch onto him, his metal heart presses into my chest and I choke on air as he fucks me, my inside clench around and the swollen sexual spot buried inside me that he teased relentlessly finally explodes.

It doesn't stop him, he keeps moving, fucking me through my explosion as I arch my hips.

I can feel my own wetness pulsing between us like a stream, running down my sides and making a slick filthy wet sound between our pressed stomachs.

That's all it takes for him to finally stiffen inside me, his lips finding mine and kissing me through his release.

* * *

><p>"Hey.." I whisper to him when he finally opens his eyes.<p>

"Hey yourself." He says back and suddenly I'm under him and I can feel the press of his morning rather impressive wood against my thighs.

"Don't you think we should eat or get cleaned up first, you know shower?"

"First off, not dirty enough for a shower. Second off, your Snow White, I'm suppose to wake you with a kiss." He tells me with a sneaky smile and it's like he is my Tony again. Everything of yesterday has been washed out of him.

Not forgotten but boxed up and placed somewhere inside his head.

"Snow White?"

"Pale skin, dark hair, and plumps lips that I plan on using later." And fuck if he isn't sexy as hell with that devilish smirk.

"Well, I can close my eyes and then you can kiss me awake."

"Fine, redo."

I roll my eyes at him and he gives a light swat on the outside of my thigh and I giggle but close my eyes and smile.

I wait but nothing happens and just before I can open my eyes, his hands are pushing my legs back apart and his mouth is pressed firmly against my clit. Thick warm lips and a wet tongue lick me hard once.

"Fuck … you smell like me…" He grunts out like a starved man.

"Tony .. no! Shower!" I hiss at him, but he ignores me and moves to my inner thigh. He bites and sucks at it, his breath is hot and it does things to me it shouldn't.

"Oh no Miss Lewis. Like I said, not dirty enough yet. You only squirted once last night, so until I'm a debouched mess by you and you smell like me in every place possible, no shower."

And fuck … that man has a filthy mouth and I think I like it.


End file.
